We are back home together. I am still up. listening to Tuvia sleep just down the hall. I need the sound of the TV for comfort, just like my mom did. I’m sure he would rather I watch in the bedroom, next to him, but I know he sleeps more soundly without it.
I can’t sleep, too nervous. I just read my post below, remembering where we were just last week. Can we make it through the next nine days while Tuvia’s new doctor takes a vacation just before we begin the challenge of solving his bleeding issue?
The one good thing I’ve leaned from our month of August 2013 is that Tuvia wants our life as much as I do and that will allow him to tolerate the insanity of health care as a patient.
We could taste it! Everything pointed to a return to our normal. We were doing everything right. Tuvia was eating, napping, taking his iron pills and feeling stronger each day. I was able to leave him for just normal life errands: buying new pjs for him and returning them the very next day. I was rescheduling appointments: hair, guitar, exercise. I met with Maris to cancel our beach vacation to Cancun but we were planning for the future, maybe the end of October even if we might hit some rain. Cancun was still worth the risk. We talked about the movies we were missing. Tuvia was insisting on making me my first cup of coffee in the morning, reading the NY Times as soon it was dropped off in the driveway. We were living normal again and I was breathing deep, appreciating the return to our routine.
At 3 am yesterday morning, Tuvia called me out of a light sleep to help him. I found him sitting on his side on the bed and in front of him, a pool of blood and he was already in his doctor mode. I don’t know how long he had been up sitting there, an hour? He was calling Ami and Ron from their homes in Hoboken and he was worried that Ami would be speeding to get to us.
Tuvia had his set of jobs for me but I was dizzy and needed to sit down across from him in the rocking chair by his bed more than once. I am not good with blood and cleaning up the floor and Tuvia were not jobs of my list. A return to normalcy was out the window once again.
Three times in three weeks we were back in emergency mode.