I spent a lot of this past summer without my guitar. I was on the road, in planes, in hotels, just not places conducive to focus on my guitar and even though I was missing it, feeling guilty and worried that I would lose ground, I kept on with my summer activities and enjoyed them.
And now I’m back home, on a more normal schedule and finally my finger nails are guitar groomed and last week Jonathan used a lot of my lesson time to replace my strings on both guitars so that I am starting clean and fresh.
But it’s hard to get back on track, hard to harness my fingers on the fret board, hard to remember the music, hard to preserve through a practice routine. Just hard.
And my lesson this week was a mountain to climb, but Jonathan was ready for me with patience, patience I didn’t have for myself.
Yes, I did practice a few times before my Monday lesson and I did feel I was making some progress, but as I started to play for Jonathan, I had a brain freeze, even with pieces I’ve been recently working on.
As I began “Schindler’s List”, a piece that’s been much harder than I ever thought it would be I couldn’t move beyond the first measure and I tried to move on, but the steady hand of an experienced teacher held me back and forced me to work small, one measure, two… repeated… again… then slowly adding more but repeating, returning…
As frustrated as I was, he was cool, steady, firm. “No, don’t go further yet.” I just wanted it all back, especially when I had so much just the night before, but of course, as a good student, I listened even if he knew I didn’t want to… he ignored that and kept me with him… until, slowly, I got it back but instead of moving beyond, I needed to be focused in the moment.
Does this sound familiar? As I write this I’m remembering what it was to keep my kids focused,moving slowly…keeping them engaged in the moment.
It’s a pleasure to be learning. As a pleasure to be preparing for a recital. The process is the thing. That’s what I loved about directing high school theater. I loved the process, even more than the production. That was for the kids who worked hard to publish to an audience. For me, I loved the creation and so it will be with this next period of play.
As I drove up to New Paltz I played my recital playlist of 10 pieces performed by the best guitarists and I often teared up as I listened
Once again, it’s the creative process, not the production that I love best.
Hey, I need to play tonight!
Digital Bonnie 
Soon, you’ll ease right back into it, Bonnie – and then it will be recital time! 🙂
And you are invited 🙂
So fun to see you with your guitar. It’s challenging to pick it up after your time away, but you’re hanging in there. I somehow missed last week’s post, so I had to read it too. You stay mighty busy for someone who’s been retired for ten years.
Let me know when and where your first concert will be. I ‘ll be sure to mark my calendar.
Something hard is still a joy when you have passion for it. Way to keep at it Bonnie! Soon those fingers will be nimble again.
Easing back in… that’s the way to do it! You’ll be strumming away with ease again soon.
You have a lesson for us here today too, Bonnie. Love that application of learning to everything really. You go. Maybe someday you’ll share a little Sound Cloud?
THIS is the line I will treasure this week, “it’s the creative process, not the production that I love best” I SO AGREE in all aspects of life!
Sounds like you had a wonderful recital and I loved Schindler’s List. The music was so ghostly and beautiful.
I love the joy on your face as you play!
So glad you’re back with your music. It means so much to you, it’ll be good to sit with it again.
I love to see a musician reconnect with a guitar. I hear that in your words and see it in your smile. Play on. Find time. 🙂
“I love the process even more than the production.” Me too. Love the happy I see in the pictures of you with your guitar and the idea that your fingernails are “guitar groomed” such precise, compact description gave me an instant image.