Letters to Tuvia #16: September 9, 2015

Morning T,

Yesterday was a day of health.  I spent a few hours at Salon Elyse, moving through Elyse’s vision for me, a Robin Wright (style) hairdo. I’m easy, always open to her visions and usually she’s right on the money and yes, I LOVED the new look and you would too!  Check the before and after pics above.

Outside Bonnie feeling good. Inside Bonnie to come and as I left Salon Elyse a call arrived from Chris in LA and I had just enough time to find a spot to drink coffee and catch up.   A nearby Panera, more modern than you favorite P Bread in Paramus.  So good to catch up with a cup of fresh coffee!

By 2:45 I was sitting in Sandy’s waiting room. Mental health time with a new/familiar support. You know her and would approve of my decision, I think.

What a comfortable office for our first action-packed hour of conversation that helped me so much, as much as I expected.  I was engaged with someone experienced with the process of bereavement.  She saw the signs of my start of this mourning experience.

I wish I had taped our session because I can’t remember it all.  Let’s say that the overall essence took me to a place of calm, slowing down, remembering to  breathe ….

Yes, I’ve heard that advice from friends, but the power of her voice, her experience… I listened differently.

I shared  my story again and  it sounded different as it left my lips.  Her responses were different.  I can’t describe how or why.  I heard it in stereo.

I thought deeply about this hour   as I drove to Hoboken for a farewell dinner that Shimon was preparing, his last with us before he leaves to return to Israel.  I kept thinking about that conversation as I sat with Ron, Randy and Leora.

A wonderful way to end the day of health.

But then I was back in the house, in the dark silence, in my comfy chair with teary eyes and sleep came slowly and didn’t last long.

I’m feeling like  the plans on my calendar for today will need some revision.  My participation with my HVWP team will have to be virtual.  I think it’s best for me to stay home in the rain and stay local today.

I’d love to be sitting at the table, engage with my wonderful circle of colleagues/friends but they will understand why I need be here today.

So T, I’m on the right road but moving in the slow lane,

Miss you,

Bonnie

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6 thoughts

  1. I’ve been messing with Yosemite today, & using my IPad, have lost 2 comments, & now, finally, back to the laptop. I love your new haircut, Bonnie, looks so easy, and sharp! Glad you have someone just for you to talk with, and that you wrote of the slow lane. Good for you, and hugs, too.

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