Yesterday in the sunshine of a warm October Tuesday, I realized that I’m living like a gypsy again. My overnight bag gets packed with some basics and I travel back and forth between your house and my apartment. Remember when that was our normal way to live? Seems like so long ago that only we knew where we were sleeping. Mondays and Wednesdays you slept in your house, I slept in my apartment. On Tuesdays you came to me, on Thursday I came to you and we stayed in the house until Sunday when you joined me over the Hudson, more to do on my turf.
It seems so long ago, doesn’t it? For the past two years I’ve been with you in the house and as much as I loved being over the Hudson, I really loved being with you every night, no matter where we lived.
Now I’m wondering and wandering, reconnecting with my space but missing your spirit back in Paramus. So I’m back filling up my overnight bag and playing it by ear, now that the ghosts don’t live in our bedroom anymore.
So now even I am not sure where I am on any given night, not yet anyway. Don’t worry, I’ll figure this out. Of course, I’ve folded in an extra element, scouting out possible spaces for a fresh start when I’m ready to close up both of our spaces. But not yet, although, knowing you, you’d be using me to move on. Hmmm, maybe not.
It’s amazing what you can do with a good night of sleep. After a dinner meet up with Hilda at her Bone Fish ( I missed ours), I was back in the house with lots of energy. I pulled out the bag overflowing with ancient video tapes and started the search…
So here’s why I”m happy- I found your interview tapes! I was sick, believing that somehow I had taped over them. Remember the hours I spent pushing you to share your stories when we were on vacation?
Actually they were always there but I just couldn’t figure out how to see them. Finally I popped out the memory stick and there on the digital tape was you, in all your glory and now I can’t wait to watch you and work on the editing of our conversations that I have no memory of what we talked about. Can’t wait until my Apple session scheduled for tomorrow. I’m thinking though, that I need a video cord to download your interviews.
After a return to work with Andrea ( I can’t wait) and some therapy with Sandy( YES!) I’ll take on this new challenge to get you on my computer and create a new piece. Can’t wait!
Don’t think, just because this post sounds like I’m back to myself. Hey, I’m not. I don’t like this return to single life. I miss you, us every minute of the day. Every minute of my life. People say it will get easier, that I need to take it one day at a time. Really?
Miss you, my soul,