Shabbat Shalom T,
We are leaving for the airport from the Hilton after the last session at NCTE but to be on the safe side I make one last trip to the bathroom. I’m walking casually, minding my own business, yes a bit tired but nothing unusual and BAM, you hit me with one of your waves and I am knocked off balance – breathless, envisioning Newark airport without you waiting to take me home. The house cold, in darkness when the cab pulls up and us off, Mary and Jackie to their cars, me to our once shared home. I am flooded with tears and I wonder, can I really take on Israel without you?
Traveling without you, just so hard without you. I’m not sure I want to T. Yes, I have my Kindle, yes I’m enjoying the upgraded airport spaces, but I’m not sure I can continue without you. Sorry.
Jackie sensed my discomfort and Mary listened to my dread.
It was good to be away but better to be back in the familiar but as usual-
It’s good and horrible all at the same time. How can that be, T?
Damn I’m missing you so much as I catch up on Scandal and dive into a bowl of fresh popcorn.
Miss you, MISS YOU,
Bonnie S.
Digital Bonnie 
So hard! Sending a hug your way.
Those heart rending moments just sneak up on you and kick you in the gut with sorrow, don’t they. You will be okay. You are smiling again. It is just you will never smile the same way again and your heart is breaking wide open to a different life. Blessing to you at Thanksgiving.
Always sending hugs your way Bonnie, wherever you choose to go.