Thanksgiving #1 is coming to an end, T,
Well wrong again. I thought this would event be a cake walk but no, I was sliding down a mountain, into a snake pit.
I sat on the couch in Jeff’s living room this morning right on the edge of explosion and as each family member stopped by to chat, there was nothing I could say, nothing- just tears.
So I sat certain that I needed to avoid the mob scene the would start to arrive in just a few hours. Thirty-three in all with lots of wonderful kids. I was looking forward to the mob, but now in the light of reality, what was I thinking? Maybe it would have been better to opt for Jane’s table or Tara’s- smaller, not family.
By noon a plan was in the works- I was ready to quietly bolt for home. I didn’t have a lot of energy but probably just enough for one careful ride home with a pit stop if necessary on the Thruway. I packed my bags and walked casually to the front door. I was almost home free until Marla and Rasha discovered me as at the door and quickly determined to hold my carry-on hostage until I agreed to reconsider and stay.
But I was sure I needed to get away. I left my bag and made my way to the car and after a few minutes I was off. Calls started coming from Marla, from my brother and then texts from Amanda, from Josh, from Rick. I couldn’t win and I couldn’t stop. In Wurstboro I pulled into the Stewart’s for a coffee and corn muffin and time to just breathe and think.
There was no place to be. No place to be, so I turned the car back to Ellenville and slowly returned to take on my first Thanksgiving without you, Tuv R. I miss being happy with you.