Letters to Tuvia#142 Blocks of Time (2-6-16)



Morning T,

Years ago, one of my favorite history professors told me that he measured  his life in blocks of time and he made sure that those blocks were always filled visually, on his calendar.   I put that notion way back in my memory banks and continued to race with time, trying to keep up with readings, writing papers, prepping for test and keeping my social life in a place where it didn’t interfere with my work toward a career.  Good thing we had SUMMER VACATION!

And then I found my way to career that I loved.  Yes, blocks of time were out of my control-7:30-2:45 my school schedule.  But by then I had a calendar too, and a pay check, and a car and vacations…independence and blocks of time to fill, slowly…

And then I met you and it took time to really figure out how to merge our calendars, our blocks of life.  I still had my full-time work blocks, and in your retirement, you had fewer blocks of work time that your now volunteered at clinics. Slowly, our calendars merged into one and I continued to temper my work blocks with our blocks, conscious about that   balance.

Time, for me,  for the last 51/2 months has been in the deep freeze. Yes,  I’ve been updating my calendar, filling in my blocks with dinner dates, with movies, with walks, with some travel, but there’s no longer any need to balance my life with your life.  There’s nothing you need from me.  I’m free to fill in the calendar without any thought about you.  No need to balance your life with mine. Yes, I’m moving into that new chapter of a present without you.

I’m in that club of widows and widowers, the half of the partnership that’s left to reconstruct a life.  How hard it is!

But… as I wind down this letter and start to get ready for a ride to Ridgewood for dinner and good conversation with Tara and Scott,  I’m going to take this letter to a good place.

Thank you T and thank you friends and family for helping me keep moving through challenge.  What a ride!

Love you all,

Bonnie S.



4 thoughts

  1. You are entering a new block of life, but at least you are still moving forward. Too often the one left behind locks themselves away from life due to feeling guilty that they are stil here. Keep traveling, we are with you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


"writing is the painting of the voice" -Voltaire-

Tammy L. Breitweiser

writer * educator * reader

lit bits and pieces

Snippets of learning and life


a motherhood community for moms who do it all


This WordPress.com site is the cat’s pajamas

Crawling Out of the Classroom

In everything that my students and I do together, we strive to find ways to use reading and writing to make the world outside of our classroom a better place for all of us to be

Lisa's Ramblings: Random Thoughts on the World We Live In...


Freeing the Writer Within

As I See It

Observations on Life

AnnaGCockerille Literacy

The Generative Power of Language: Building Literacy Skills One Word at a Time

Haddon Musings

There are 11,507 stories in Haddonfield; this is one of them.

To Read To Write To Be

Thoughts on learning and teaching

Just Let Me Teach

MrsWp, ELA Teacher


How to stay sane studying to become a teacher, and eventually, during your first years (when I get there!)


Smile! You’re at the best WordPress.com site ever

%d bloggers like this: