Letters to Tuvia#275: Loose Ends & Beyond (8-5-16)

Last year at this moment we were packed and heading to Saratoga.  We were on our last adventure and we didn’t know it and that was a good thing.  It was always good to live in our present.  We would be celebrating my birthday on our way home and I didn’t care as much as I used to.  There was a shift, focusing more on you.  We couldn’t know then that you wouldn’t make it to the end of the month.  We were living in our present-  I was  focused on the ride to Tara’s, meeting up with James, dealing with our hotel room.  Finally navigating the backroads to Tara’s new farm and your concern that we were lost- We were never lost.            Finally there  we walked together.  You with Scott, me with Tara.  We  watched  you just melt into a comfy chair on the porch and take in the overwhelming beauty of the place and gracious hosting of Tara and Scott.  We watched you breathing it all in.  We watched you…

Your last adventure…with me…

And here I am.  Birthday weekend… Jane and Michael tonight for Japanese and Jazz… Ellenville tomorrow with my family   Hoboken on THE DAY your family.  Leora is creating the cake of my choice-  red velvet, of course.

I’m feeling tender, easily moved to tears.

But here’s something you wouldn’t except.  Home yesterday, working on ends of my report, practicing Tango on the guitar for my lesson and the phone rings.  I’m hesitant to answer but I pick it up and hear that pause, itching to hang it up but I hear a voice with a familiar accent- Israeli… and yes she is from Hebrew Online.  I stay on with her but I’m poised  to politely say not interested and hang up.  But I don’t.

She engages me.  We talk about Israel and my history with the study of Hebrew… and she offers me a great option- private, one-on-one lessons.  I’ve been here before.  I’ve taken on the beast before.  Hey I even lived in Israel for a year before I knew you.  Came home happy to be back in my English world.  And I was back in it for a few years when the kids were not yet speaking English.  I don’t know that you cared much.  We spoke English. Hebrew for 5 year olds was not enough for our conversations.

But now, navigating through Rosenberg conversations with a bit a English and a lot of Hebrew… I’m ready to try again. 50 lessons… Let’s see if I can take on the beast! A new challenge coming my way for September!

Miss you Tuvia R.  Miss you…

Bonnie S.

8 thoughts

  1. Celebrating your birthday with the gift of learning something new is an awesome thing, Bonnie. I love your grit to start again. It is hard to learn a new language, but it seems you have the motivation this time. I remember seeing about your visit to Tara & Scott’s farm; good memories make life good no matter when. I hope this coming trip down that beautiful river is terrific. Hugs to you in all the journeys of the heart.

  2. We never know when the last of something will be. Your memories of the trip and your birthday are tinged with sadness because of its place in the line of memories, but it was a special trip before you knew it was the last one. What a challenge to take on Hebrew! Good for you!

  3. Thinking of you on this birthday without Tuvia. So glad you have happy memories and those wonderful pics from last year. Congrats on taking on a new challenge. You’re amazing!

  4. First, happy birthday Bonnie. This letter moved me so, especially your line, We were never lost. I am writing about it and will post later. I need to dwell in that line for a bit.

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