Letters to TuviaY2#24: Made it to Another Day (10-30-16)

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Sunday Morning, YAY,

Yes, I still get excited to wake up, make the bed and drink my first cup of coffee in the light of a brand new day after a slow Saturday filled with activity and sadness- just more of that balance without you- activity that’s good, inactivity that can lead to feeling of melancholy.  Yes, that happened yesterday.

The day began with a burst of energy- an early morning workout session with Anthony, back home for a healthy breakfast, off for some shopping in Paramus- nope, no tears in my familiar haunts…a few  purchases.  All good.

But back home… slowdown… without clarity I was back on the couch and that exhausting question- what next?   My guitar was calling me, lonely too.  I tried to ignore her calls, but good thing I couldn’t.  Up, off the couch,  I picked her up, tuned her and played and played and played…ahhh… felt so good. Yes, I was calm and peaceful.

Movie time- 45 Years was now on Showtime. Even with two viewings at the Burns,  I selected it from my numerous choices  and soon realized that I had napped through  some critical scenes, even during the second time.  But now in my space, holding the controls, I got a a complete viewing.  I can’t say it was exactly what I needed.  This was not a joy ride through a 45-year marriage , but it was a movie with the heft that we both loved.  I can imagine that we would still be discussing it now, maybe even inspired by the story, sharing things about our past that we had left unspoken.  This movie is about what happens when the unexplored ghosts of the past corrupt your present and ultimately your future.

Here’s something good- as I just wrote that last note about what we might have done together with this movie, I’m not sobbing, just imagining without sadness. And, as I feel the sunshine streaming in, I’m going to finish this letter, grab a real breakfast, and get ready for a walk at the river before the rain arrives in a few hours.  How’s that for healthy?

Wish you were here to join me for a Sunday adventure,

Bonnie S.

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4 thoughts

  1. Happy Sunday, Bonnie. I hope you have a good walk, and make it back before the rain. It’s foggy here this am, but we have no rain in sight. From all these posts you’ve written, it feels like you are in a place for living a life that’s good, missing Tuvia, but finding joy too. I’m off to the bookstore later this am, hoping to find a few customers, and enjoy the sunshine.

  2. Hope you had a great walk. Our temps are quite warm, no rain here. I will be gathering groceries for the week today, then prepping for my work this week.

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