Evening T and Slicers,
Honestly, I wish I had better news for all of you but hey, it is what it is…
When Tuvia and I were first getting to know each other and we lived in our own spaces during the week, every morning as I sipped my first cup of coffee, filled a bowl with raisin bran and ice cold milk before I left for school Tuvia would call and ask what I was eating for breakfast.
I laughed sweetly and surprised. ” Why do you want to know what I eat for breakfast?”
He laughed and thought, “Its not really what you eat for breakfast but it’s how we begin to share our lives. I want us to share the little things and then the bigger things… the things that will be harder to share.”
Hmmm… I liked that…
After years of living on my own, sharing, partnership left me breathless and sometimes as much as I loved the idea of sharing it was hard to break the my routines of singularity. But I trusted Tuvia… and new habits began to emerge.
I could ride back home after a full day of workshops at our writing project on a Saturday morning and on the way, Tuvia would call and want to know what I did for the hours I was away and I shared the details, soon without hesitation, because we were were sharing our lives…
I am now in the market for a new car, the first new car since Tuvia’s passing and yes, it’s fun, but I’m missing that call…
I’ve always loved cars, years before Tuvia came along and he could care less about cars. When he was ready for a new one, he took a ride to the local Ford dealership in his silver Explorer and came back home after a few hours with a new version of his Ford Explorer maybe in white rather than silver. And when Ford Escapes, a smaller SUV, were created in hybrid form, Tuvia made the move. That was change in Tuvia’s book.
Now me, I was someone from a different planet. As I got ready for a new car I took him along on my search We walked the streets of Ridgewood, New Jersey once, sometimes twice a day when the weather was right for us. I stopped along our route when I saw something interesting: the new Sabb, a red mustang, the latest Audi TT. Tuvia, a Ford man. Tuvia stopped with me and because I loved cars with a passion, he did too. Soon he could proudly announce that the car in front of us was a Prius and yes, he was right!
He was in my life and I was in his and we were partners sharing our passions.
I am now down to: a loaded Prius Prime Advantage vs an all-wheel drive Mini Cooper Clubman and I’m trying to get excited, but it’s just okay… the way life is for me these days. It’s just okay… just treading water most of the time. There isn’t much color in this life with him.
I thought it was getting easier. It isn’t.
Miss you T,