Dear T,
What’s new in Year 3?
This year I am moving forward and looking back on my 20 years with you, and these tough 2 years without you. Yes, of course I’m trying to make the best of this life. Yes, I promise. Although on a very beautiful Labor Day, I never left my space, BUT I did make good use of the porch- working, reading and napping out there for most of the afternoon. I know, it’s not what we would have done but I’ve got to make my way in this life in the way that it best suits me, right? Let’s leave that aside for now.
What’s very interesting is that for almost two full years I woke up most mornings with a coating of dried tears over my eye lids and continued to add new tears as the morning progressed. As I left home and moved around the mall, the streets, everywhere. the flood continued. I wasn’t sobbing, just tearing up. Some people might have thought I was suffering from allergies. Most probably didn’t notice. I didn’t care. It was a protective layer from you, allowing me the time and space to mourn your absence in my present. I was in a protective cocoon for as long as I needed to be… and now…
My Eyes Are Wide Open 🙂
Labor Day Solo!
It’s always been a tricky day. When I was still teaching, it was a last day of summer vacation. I was giving up shorts and sandals for school clothes and a work schedule and fresh groups of kids to learn with. I yearned for barbecue 🙂 and you were more than happy to satisfy… but in return I needed to get us guests to entertain. Tricky… you didn’t like to plan too far in advance.
I didn’t have plans. So this year I crafted a day I could feel good about:
Early morning rituals continued: NY Times, coffee, TV news.
Then a Labor Day surprise- a brand new movie on my list to see in a theater was being offered on iTunes for $3. I should have been suspicious- Queen on Spain with Penelope Cruz… not too good, but of course it was worth seeing her.
I was back in my routine- guitar practice, reading, exercise, catching up with friends, writing,great left-overs … just one more element to add to the mix and that comes today.
I’m off soon to begin a class in sketch logging- what’s that?
Bonnie S.
PS Have a great year teachers!!!!!
Digital Bonnie 
Wow. Powerful. Thanks for offering another way to communicate thoughts and feelings through a letter. I know it always helps me to think of an audience for my writing, and yours clearly inspired a beautiful piece.
“I’ve got to make my way in this life in the way that it best suits me.” How true, Bonnie. Many times people try to tell us what they think we should do, but no one know better than we do what is best for us. Your strength has really shown through over the last two years.