Letters to Tuvia Y3:Monday (2-26-18)

Afternoon T,

I remember our first official date.  We met in Westwood, on the corner of Westwood Ave.  I left my car just across the street and in your white Ford Explorer we drove to Jersey City for Turkish food.   You drove a lot that night, as we took time to figure out if we had enough in common to try for a relationship. other, Touching on many topics, I casually asked about movies.

“Do you like to go to the movies?

” YES!  I love movies! You?”

“Me too! We were on to something very good.

The movie I watched today, at my Burns movie course, was one that I am sure you would have loved, The Tokyo Story,  created by Japanese director, Yasujiro Ozu.  I haven’t seen many Japanese movies that weren’t created by Kurosawa. Ozu is your kind of director, taking on serious themes of Japan that would have given us so much to chew on.

Even as I watched this film I really  wasn’t prepared for its ultimate focus.  While we believed that the Japanese family unit revered their elder members and their children showed respect, this film destroyed that notion.  Elderly parents were treated better by their daughter-in-law, widowed for 8 years when her young husband is killed in WWII.  It is her in-laws who encourage her to get back out into the world and stop mourning.  As she confesses her deep loneliness, my heart broke.  Everyone in class felt it as well.   I can’t wait to see more of his work but next week we are moving to Italy- Fellini. I wish you could join us.

I can’t say that you would have loved Call Me By Your Name,   but with grown up Amanda Jill,  after both Eliana and Sadie  were down and sound asleep at record speed, we claimed our couches in the living room, the same living room where,  Manda  and her brother Josh, woke up early in the morning as kids do and came racing into this living room  to begin their day watching Saturday cartoons as I snoozed, happy to be interrupted if either needed my attention.

As we clicked around the movie apps, Manda was open to watching Call Me By Your Name,  knowing full well that I didn’t even know how many times I’d seen it and was comfortable, as our conversations moved through the summer of 1983, as the precocious 17-year-old Elio Perlman and his parents spend their summer days at their 17th century villa in Lombardy, Italy.  When Oliver, his father’s grad student visitor from the US. is a pleasant surprise for everyone, especially Elio.  The music, the town, the house, carry us along… until we are poised for the last two scenes, and the wifi, quits on us.  Manda wants the details, not at all upset that she is denied finishing the film.  I was more annoyed.

I’m so lucky to still share couches with Manda. There was room for you…

Miss you Tuv,

Bonnie S.

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